Its the contdown...

Well the world will now stop turning until I leave for Japan..that seems to be where the family is focused and not much more is being discussed or done in this house...
We are in full get "ready to go" mode, so I may be talking a lot of blah, blah, blah as we finalise stuff....its only a week away...
Everyone is very excited and I am getting that way too..

Full moon madness..

We are getting madder and crazier every full moon...better to stay in and lock the doors.
But last night I was out in the cool, cool night amongst the possoms and the light of the full moon.
It was a bit cooler than even I expected and I guess thats a hint that its time to rug up when heading outdoors after 6pm.
All our charms, spells and crystals are now charged up and ready to go to new homes and work their magic!
The full moon can be very enlightening, especially this one which had the energies of Scorpio that lead us all to our dark side where we all seem to have to deal with inner demons and bring up issues that we want to run away from...yes, I can attest to that!

Looking past it all..

It is really, really a very good thing that I am going away shortly - cause sometimes I just wish I was no longer in this town.
Today - this morning is one of those moments when being on the moon would be a really good option.
Having a break and being in the wider world for a week or two will be very therapeutic.

I am glad to be busy and glad to have a place to go, many places to go...my head keeps being turned to notice things that  cause me pain ...maybe the lesson is to learn to turn away.

Nothing is ever as it seems...

And so life is often just "like a box of chocolates" - you might get a description of what it is you are about to taste, but often can be very dissapointed as it does not turn out to be quite like you anticipated.
Complex associations with other people can get tiring - you can get frustrated at trying to work out someones "flavour" especially if it changes from, day to day...
For God sake if you are a caramello bear- stay a caramello bear....dont turn into a turkish delight when I am not expecting it!!!!!!!

sometimes ....I just hate chocolate!

A beautiful lunch at Morpeth!

Very quiet day yesterday - headed out in the afternoon to hang all of my paintings at Cafe13 at Lorn.
It was a bit harrowing to take all of my "babies" away - but the Cafe is a gorgeous little secret hideaway and the paintings compliment the decor nicely.
Now just some sales would be totally fantastic - they will be hanging till the end of May.
A lady also came to pick up a painting that she had put down a deposit for  a few weeks back and so we decided to head out to Morpeth for a late lunch and enjoy the extra bit of cash - we chose "Savannagh's " which is right next to the bridge.
We sat out on the back verandah in the afternoon sun and had a lovely meal.
Two weeks before I go to Japan.......

An interesting time ahead...

Well at least mum is ok and stable...she had another turn a day ago and yet again went to the emergency ward at Blacktown Hospital....every time they call me about her I get very nervous and worried because at her age you just never know.....even a small cold can do you in. Every virus makes them weaker and something like a stomach bug can be fatal.
So I am happy now - I can rest this weekend and know that dear old mum is ok.
We are flat out at the moment arranging a retreat and organising flights away to Brisbane for a conference and market stalls....all at once.
Gosh...I cannot believe all of this...
We are also scheduling another meditation evening, now on Wednesday nights at 6pm.
Next week we head out later in the week to do some more mingling and organising....its tough, but someone has to do it!!!!
Also we are planning a very special Samhain - so watch the web site for details!
Have a great weekend all - remember ANZAC day - lest we forget!

Quite a day!

Had a terrific day yesterday.
I have organised an art exhibition of most of my works to be held at Cafe13 at Lorn, Maitland starting next Monday!
Whoopee....I am hoping for some sales!
Michael the operator and chef was a really lovely bloke.
We also got to see Anique Radiant Heart and speak with her about some workshops for later this year at Sacred Elements. Her first one will be "Singing in the Chakras".
She is quite a powerful woman with amazing energy.
Also had another bif tarot class last night - these girls are amazing, they are so being challanged by the tasks I am giving them but reaching in deep to understand the cards - bravo girls!
We all agreed that we should have had some wine last night just to make the process easier.....we went to the dark side of our souls and it was really hard work!
Sorry you missed it D and L - maybe we can do a class with just you guys, cause this spread was really worth getting in to.

Hoovering out the old cells with an energy cleanse.....

Had an energy healing today - I certainly needed it.
Have been carrying a headache for a day - and we have too much to do. Preparing for STOMP in Civic Park next week.
Anybody watching Australia's got talent?
Wow.....just got blown away by a busking family from Queensland called "The Twine".....

Only a step away from the burning times....

Just when you think that we have stepped up into times of greater religious tolerance it does not take much to drop us back a few centuries, does it now...
Just a few incidences this weekend have sent me in a spin.

I have come up against a number of hostile attitudes about my beliefs over the years and every time it happens it surprises me!

Because I know that I am not doing anything wrong!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And I wonder why others think that I do?
Why do some consider pictures of the Goddess ( and angels too ) as  idols yet pictures saints or of Jesus hanging on a cross is not!!!!
That praying or chanting to my Gods is any different from praying or singing to what some believe is the one and only God! ( well, maybe I just answered my own question......)
I wonder how many other religions/faiths are as tolerant of others as we are?
How many consider every action as having consequences, that make one responsible for every thought, that hold the earth and every living thing as sacred...
That allows for growth and individuality and compassion to all.

And yet I am to be made to feel evil and ostracized?

I dont believe in the devil - he does'nt exist except in the minds of those that feel there is a good manipulative reason for him to exist...
Some people need to get over themselves...
so where is the love?

ok...thats my rant.

Almost done!

Must say that all this standing is not doing anything for my back!
But the book selling thing is almost done - yippee...
I am working all weekend so cannot really rest just yet..I am a little pooped.
Might pop in tomorrow night and just see our little Cathy Brooker at her book launch "Purity"at Studio 48 in New Lambton.
Knowing what its like to be an artist who needs her friends to support her I will pop my head in on my way home from work and wish her luck.
All of us may not all agree with the content of the book, but hey...Cathy has given it her best shot and stuck to her guns and did it!
Its her story, her passion - she is entitled to her vision.
This is her life's work - all that she is.
That is to be respected.
Also two 'ferals' are holding a picnic at Sugarloaf tomorrow - I hear there will be chanting and drumming and good company.

Big Day!

Its been a long day but such a successful one!
We left for Sydney this morning at 7.30 to be able to fit in the obligatory visit to the Polish Deli in Parramatta.
Then I dropped in on mum who actually looked far better than I was preparing for. She is in pain, but it is obvious that she is being well taken care of at the Nursing Home and that makes me very happy. They are doing the job far, far better than I could.
Our conversation was scattered and short but just giving her a hug and kiss was therapeutic for both of us.
Then we headed off the Chatswood to meet Stacey Demarco ( how cool!!! )
She was totally fantastic - so down to earth and really helpful.
We will be starting a career coven based on her work and covens that she has created in other cities in Australia and we wanted to get some pointers from her on how to proceed.

Then we headed home and I then got together with some cool chicks to have a tarot class at Chaos Central.
I was very impressed. The girls worked hard - I am a hard task master but they excelled  - all of them.
Its a delight to watch the girls work so hard to make sense of the cards. I love to hear their take on what they see and it always teaches me as much as I hope it teaches them.

No longer above the law!

Well, the much controversial athiest Richard Dawkins is one of two gentlemen who is finally holding the Pope accountable for the rampaging priestly misconducts that have been going on for centuries....
no longer is the Catholic Church beyond the law, or will it remain a law unto itself?
Will it fall into the line of saying that God will be judge and jury?
And will  two "Our Father's " and three "Hail Mary's " be enough ?
Am I being politically incorrect here?
I guess we will see where this goes...

Poland is in mourning. Maybe the President was not the most loved leader, but there were over 90 people who lost their lives in this tragedy and the country is united in grief. It was very sad to see, in the news, the President's identical twin brother at the coffin saying his final farewell.
Also the daughter who has lost both father and mother. Most distressing.

Tragedy for Poland

I was shocked by the news of the plane crash that happened yesterday, killing the President and his wife and many Polish officials who were all travelling on the same plane. What a tragedy for the country and for the families of those involved.
This is something that would have rocked the nation - this accident has affected many spheres of government, industry and military.
My daughter, who lives in Melbourne texted me yesterday telling me "how awful what has happened". I did not know at that point what she was talking about.......she had seen it on Facebook....it had just happened, so I called hubby and asked whether anything had been said on TV. It hadnt yet, but he went on the news links on the computer and confirmed what my daughter had said.
There is something a bit weird about getting info that fast - it would be totally awful to find out about the death of a loved one that way. I feel for the parents who have lost children and find out about it because of impersonal facebook entries..........it just seems so cold and so distant......there is no privacy, no respect, everything is just a piece of instant news fit to be forgotten in a minute. It is instant gratification and sensationalism to which we are now totally desensitised...what in the hell makes us really sad or moved or shocked anymore...is there anything?

Revisiting the Past........

I sometimes feel myself drawn back into old feelings and a great deal of heaviness comes over me. The last twelve months have been difficult and emotional - a year ago my mum was functioning well. Within a year she has deteriorated to a point where life has little meaning.

This has really pushed me to go for what I want while I still can - just to go for it.
There is no hidden agenda -other than to be happy and help provide for my family.
Somrtimes it is just necessary for people to move on and do what they need to do.

The most important lesson that I have learnt recently is something that I have already stated here - if I am to continue down this path, then I need to do it because I want to and not to please any body else.
Because, I can't please everybody.


So I need to let people be ...and allow them to drift in and out of my life without feeling that I need to reel them in closer. I just cant do that...

and it also means that they need not feel that they have to prop me up - its scary letting go ...my daughter has moved to Melbourne and I do miss her but she needs to find her own way and love her life totally.

We live in a free country in a place full of opportunity - how wonderful is that!
Yet we build our own little prisons and push blame wherever we can as to how horrid our life has become.
Maybe its time to make small changes and not be ashamed that you have.

No rest for the wykd...

I worked today selling books at a shopping centre that I cannot mention because when I talked about this before I got my arse kicked, so I have to remain "vague"....
Easter was a quiet affair with a family get together on Sunday morning - thats about as exciting as it got!
My mum is in hospital again - her arm giving her more trouble and needing to be reset.
Poor thing - I feel so sorry for her, it must be just awful to be so disorentated about every aspect of your life.
I feel in a hard place because if I go and see her it will make her more distressed by just a short visit and then staying any longer she forgets that I am there or who I am....
This time last year she was still functioning and at home - wow...what a difference a year has made.
Now she is in total distress and does not know who her family members are..
I am all over the shop this week with some time being spent at the books and some at Chaos Central ...at least I got to paint this weekend.!