I seem to have been in suspended animation...in a world between the worlds, where in one world, life and crap went on and then sorted itself out in my absence, and in the other I was light and lifted and in joy and happiness having a most brilliant time.
My weekend away was super.
I learnt a great deal.
I had huge life lessons, actually.
A terrific experience on the ghost tour in Sydney ( although no ghosts )
and then James Van Praagh, who is just so gay and a real character - his meditation was one of those special moments and of course another attack of the shakes that lasted about 45 minutes and left me exhausted.
What is with that?
The Mardi Gras Parade happened to be forming right in front of our hotel and we had a front seat view of many of the floats and the magnificant costumes ( or lack of ).
I will share some of the best photos with you all in the next day or two.
The energy created by all of this fun was very uplifting and returning to Newcastle meant finding out that things had not been settled and more emotions had been made raw yet again.
Maybe my exhaustion added to it all but I found it hard to cope tonight and as much as I enjoyed the great effort put in by Shann and Helen in the ritual, I needed to make myself scarce.
I send my blessings to all .....find peace and find it quickly.

Please stop with the scratching!!

Poor little puggy boy is scratching so bad that he has sores all over his skin from the horrible flea infestation.
I have tried all the powders, shampoos and tablets available - today I go to get the super dooper new one...at a cost of $80.
But if it works it will be worth it.....
What does it possibly do to a doggy when, once the tablet is taken, all fleas on the dog are supposed to die within half an hour?
Surely it must not be good for the doggie?

 

 

She has left the room.....for the weekend anyway!

I am off ( well you knew that ) but I mean I am off for the weekend to Sydney with my dear friend to do some really cool stuff!
Firstly a ghost tour of the "Rocks" tomorrow night.
Saturday we are doing girlie stuff like shopping and eating really fattening food and then maybe the Art Gallery and Adyar Bookshop.
Then more food and coffee and then we are seeing James Van Praagh, the American Medium who works on the show "Ghost Whisperer"....
We will also be trying to avoid the thousands of people who are in the city for the Gay Mardi Gras......wish us luck.
I will come back to some hard work scrubbing some walls and cupboards and making things nice and shiny...knowing Sharon she will make me use hot water, sweat and elbow grease.....but I rather use something with plenty of toxic bleach and stuff that can take paint off with one wipe......cause I'm just lazy.... he...he..
I also have a full moon to attend with my beautiful Autumns on Sunday and hugs going to the Priestess for the night cause I know she has been a sick girl ( and she also looked after my injured birdie from two weeks ago for which I am very grateful.

Also a cheerio to Gayle who I know is just about to leave to us for a while to continue with her chosen career.I have no doubt that she will enjoy her time away and that she will learn so much. A very, very, dedicated midwife indeed. Best wishes and big, sweaty, smelly hugs..........to you!

May love surround you, wherever you go......

Did you wake up singing?
It happened last week after the workshop and it happenend again last night.
I woke up and the songs were still in my ears.
It was a very special evening. No one held back...nice.
I would sneak peeks at people's faces...and there was a smile on every one!
I cannot thank Esme enough for the two beautiful nights that we have shared. I hope that you all say a small prayer of thanks and wish her well as she returns back home over the next day or two.

We did thank her and gave her a card and a donation from us all for having given so much of her time.
I think its so cool that this woman had travelled across the globe, but, she took her harp and her head dress and bought a beautiful ritual gown to wear for ritual.......she was prepared........but I must say, I just loved the THONGS!!!!! So Australian!!!

I personally, have learnt so much from this small exercise and I hope that we can get in contact with more people who can come and do some more ritual workshops so that we can experience other interpretations. Doing things differently......cant be bad can it?
Thank you all for coming last night...

I have the keys to the castle!!!!

How nice would it be to live with a view of the Lake  from your dining room, eh?
Well today I visited someone who lives with such a view.
Standing in their living room you look straight across their back balcony and there is the Lake, with boats and all - picture perfect.Out the back are a few steps and you go straight down to the water...How cool is that!!!!!
I stood there and dreamed and told this person that I was "very impressed"...
Tonight we have Aunty Esme "part two" so it will be lots of fun....

TODAY WAS AN EXCEPTIONALLY FANTASTIC DAY INDEED!

What more can I say?

A truely memorable day....

No rest for the wykd!

Just when I thought that it was going to be fine to sit on my arse and not do anything, along comes a doctor who has the audacity to tell me that my cholesterol is up, my iron is down, my liver is not working properly and my blood sugar is up too!
How rude!
Now I have to go on a diet and EXERCISE!
Please save me............so I went on the Wii Fit yesterday ( first time in 360 days ) and could only manage 10 minutes , but I had only put on 1kg in those 360 days ...so that must mean that I was a lazy so and so 12 months ago too!!!!
Now I need to get a grip - and dont even show me a carton of skim milk, I bought some of that yesterday, made one coffee with it and have decided that there is only so much suffereing a person can take....
must ask Sharon for some advice...

Great Party and a surprise visit from Sharon!

It was a weekend of parties!
Firstly Gayle's fantastic do on Saturday with plenty of good food and friends sharing a champagne or two, and a guest appearance from Sharon who seemed to dominate with her presence - then she left as quickly as she had arrived!
Boy what an energy!!!!
She was full of ideas and made us all laugh out loud.
Gayle's birthday cake was very yummy, not to mention that is was a checkerboard design!
Then today, an afternoon at Pearl Beach on the Central Coast, near Umina. My hubby's 45th!
Again, more food, mostly made by me and fresh bread and rolls baked by hubby the night before.
We also had pavlova and went for a walk along the beach - the sand was sooooo hot I could not even walk on it and it was so humidn that the sweat was pouring down my back as if I was standing under a running shower.
It was a lovely day, but I am just a bit over the heat - and tomorrow is going to be just as hot.......

Birthday Party comming up and more...

This weekend is Birthday Party weekend - yeehaa!
Tomorrow I am heading out to Coal Point to wish a friend happy birthday and say goodbye...and then Sunday I am going to Pearl Beach ( Gosford ) to a family 'do' - my hubby's birthday.
I have to make salads and goodies.......so the diet will have to wait till Monday.
I also should start walking again ( Diana prompt ) ...I had a beautiful dream last night about a special place where I will be spending much time shortly ( no...not James Fletcher ...although.... ) It was bright and happy and it felt so good.
I am looking forward to feeling really positive and good. These last few months have really been a test of my resolve, my patience and my dedication to my path and my future....
There are moments when I have a feeling of fear and just think, well maybe I am just being a stupid woman...but then I know there is no other way.
The only way is forward and all I am afraid of is actually succeeding.
Silly me!

Was that good or what!

Last night was a totally amazing experience - I have not seen that many smiling faces in one room for a very long time!
It was great to see so many who are so important to me and also many new ones who were so warmly welcomed. I am very happy to be part of the crew to have made last night's chanting workshop happen.
Sharon, of course, was such an integral part of the whole event as were other ferals and also Esme who we will be indebted to forever.
Could we organise a workshop in Canada for next year? I am sure we could?
Maybe a small roadtrip?

I am still flying high and we will have to keep practising all of those songs so that we dont forget them...ritual will never be the same again.

A fantastic night of chant comming up!

Tommorrow is a big day for me - a new project! Planning a good evening where people will be able to experience ritual and chanting, old fashioned stuff...the stuff of our ancestors ..a gift given to us by an elder.
I am very excited and hope all will go to plan and that people will show up...always that worry before a planned event that things dont fall flat!
As much as I love Sharon and the Ferals I am hoping to see some old and new faces.
I guess we will see?
Next weeks ritual is planned and looks fantastic!
I have prepared two more canvasses to paint and need to get in and focus on my art, but all of this new stuff is turning my sedate and mundane world upside down- which is a good thing ( sedate and mundane can be easy and known territory and can be damn boring after a while - rountine ) so before my brain turns to shit and my arse gets so big it will never get up off the couch...I need to step into the unknown and know what its like to be blessed with the opportunity to just "have a go"!
How many people in this world would love to have the freedom that we have?
To just have a go........
Not to....would be totally disrespectful to the opportunities of life..

Mrs Porter's House

I visited Mrs Porter's House this afternoon, and today must have been the day that everybody decided to do the same thing - there were stacks of people going through which made it difficult to really get a feel for the place.
Some of the historic background to the place was fascinating especially when we were told that this house was about the end of the line of Newcastle township about 100 years ago with only Chinese gardens and fields past that spot.
There is definately energies in the house, especially in the back end  - the kitchen and laundry areas with me feeling tickling on my shoulder while standing there and checking out the old wood fired stove.
It is a beautifully restored home with intricate stencilling on the wooden ceilings and old worn linoleum on the floors.
The two old ladies are still living out their lives in that place and I am sure they get a kick out of people comming in and giving the old place some life.....

Did I leave those ghosties behind?

I am sure I did.....but this morning I am tired. A three hour walk will do that to you! Did not get home till about 12.30 in the morning from the ghost tour. We had a great night last night with lots of curly questions and ghostly activity.There was a pair of ladies that were staying overnight in the "haunted" room at the pub down the road and were intending to use a ouija board to contact the spirits..well...after I stopped laughing, I told them not to be so stupid especially since some reports have said that this particular ghostie can be somewhat violent, so they were far better off just to play it cool and enjoy whatever experience was going to come without putting extra effort into it.
I know ouija boards can be just plain rubbish, but I have also heard many, many accounts of people getting some really wierd stuff happening (is it their own minds creating the results?) so best err on the side of caution.
Lots of reactions up near the Avenue of Trees where our lovely servant girl is located and Closebourne House is completely different, the energies are now quite foreboding and not too happy about us being there at all....

Lost another little soldier!

Well I got an official email from another student  ( K ) to say that she was also leaving YAAD.
Now, that leaves five girls......the numbers are dwindling.I will keep going, of course...but I dont know how long this will all continue. I am standing on shaky ground.
Meanwhile a lovely afternoon was spent yesterday listening to wiccan chants and songs sung by a true crone.
It all sounded so familiar, so reasurring, so positive and uplifting and it made my hair stand on end...I hope that you will feel the same way.
Tonight I go to play with ghosties - will miss you Jewell and I will say hello to the girlie up on the Avenue of Trees for you, oh, and a cheerio to Bishop Tyrrell as well.....

Another one bites the dust...

Another one of my students left my class today...looking for brighter pastures?
What am I to do?
Soon I will be standing in front of maybe, three?
That should be fun - I know that the future is rushing up to meet me at every corner I turn and this is all very unexpected because it is all so positive!
I have not experienced so much positivity in so long that I dont know what to do with it.
On the other hand,
I have heard so much odd gossip and old rehashed shit from people, things that I never knew about but that have resurfaced now, that I was a bit blown away by the things that people have said about me.....but it really does not matter.I have gotten over it.
Old gossip is actually more pathetic than new gossip and its a bit like reading New Idea or Womens Day - it does not pay to believe a word of it.....in most cases gossip is just people voicing their personal opinions out aloud...in most cases it is harmless, really..it is only when it is then spread and added to and when it turns malicious and gets a life of its own...thats when it needs to stop.

Happy Birthday Diana

Its official! Diana is an old fart tomorrow...I have been an old fart for some time know - ask anyone they will tell you its true.
And it happened when I wasnt even looking!

I had a day of networking and mingling today....hard work all of this mingling stuff.
I went to Mirium Gardens for the first time - wow what an amazing place, how beautiful....... and the back yard goes on forever. Their front driveway is bigger than my whole block of land...a wonderous place of tranquility right in the middle of Charlestown. "Reflections Within" at Belmont has some gorgeous stuff to buy - the shop is constantly changing and I met the lovely lady down at "Angels on the Lake"at Warners Bay and found out that she had worked all the way through having being treated for breast cancer - imagine the stress!
Now she is selling up - wants to go on a holiday. Who could blame her.
More mingling tomorrow with the ferals...maybe Sharon will be there?

This ghost stuff is doing my head in!

Someone explain to me where apparitions stop being manifested by us, and when they start being there to begin with?
Does this all need to be so complicated?
The more I read the more I feel that most ghostly stuff is created through our own furtive little minds, and so powerful and strong are we that we can actually create an energy, being, thing, apparition beyond and apart from ourselves.
Why then, can I feel changes and shifts in energy that seems to be residual and resides in a place?
This is not something that I have created or thought about, in most cases it comes to me, through me, I can feel it.
I need to experience more and do more research - I need to get this straightened out in my head but to do that I have to be ready to experience more.
This is fascinating stuff......

Is it winter yet?

Never thought that I would say it but I think that I will be looking forward to the cooler weather this year. This humidity makes me feel like I am melting. I feel like I weigh 500kgs ( no comments from my hubby here please )
and I am not really motivated at all to do anything.
I need to maybe look at a motivational spell to get me up and active  - I need to lose some weight before I explode, I have to clean the house before I can no longer find the floor, I need to do some art and work on some workshop material.The bloody computer is too addictive and is an incredible time waster.
I also need to look at finding more organic foods, I have been watching a program on SBS called "Gourmet Farmer"about this fellow who lives in Tasmania and has "gone bush". He grows his own veges, has chooks, pigs, etc and shows us how to live off the land and to barter with neighbours for everything that you need. The scenery is stunning ( Tassie of course ) but the food is amazing!
Just shows us what crap we eat from the supermarkets. He went to an orchard where a grower has over 200 varieties of apples - some are small, some look pretty ordinary and most are not accepted by the supermarkets, but one thing these apples have is FLAVOUR!
He showed us how to kill chickens in a humane way, as humane as can be expected.
How much bad karma are we getting from chooks that spend their whole life traumatised and then die in a most awful way?
This cannot be good....

I just cant leave you!

Today I was heading back to Sydney to mum and driving up Perks street on my way to pick up mother in law when I saw something in the middle of the road. As I drove up slowly I realised that is was a rainbow lorikeet sitting there right smack in the middle of the road.
It looked dazed and was not moving...so I couldnt just drive past it.
I had to pull over and check it out.
I could not work out whether it was just dazed or getting ready to die so I pulled it off the road and headed over into the bushes to leave it there...
but I just couldn't leave it there...so I gave it a quick Reiki treatment..but I still could just not leave it there..
so I was in a dilemma - where do I take it? I have to get to Sydney...... now!
So I thought I would head down to a lady I knew who lived two houses down, but the gates were shut.
So I thought that I would head to Shann's place and beg her to help.
She lives just around the corner and I got the bird again and put it in the passenger seat and drove the few metres to Shann's place.
Shann came to the rescue supplying a cage - the bird must have come to its senses because it delivered a lethal bite as I tried to get it out of my car.
I told Shann to let it go if it revived later or to please bury it if it were to die...
I will let you know what happens....hopefully I scored some good karma points.

Happy Lughnassadgh!

Its supposed to be the time of the year to mark the first of three harvest festivals - a time when we start to see the changes in the seasons and the days growing milder...yet today has been so incredibly humid and still very warm. I am sure that the weather has something to do with how tired I am feeling and the old war injury ( neck and shoulders ) can sometimes be screamingly ouchy...
Having to deal with mum and get her to a specialist and in and out of Sydney is quite a scary thing and I dont really like doing it by myself. I can go with hubby any day and sit and annoy him in the car as a passenger, but driving in Sydney is something will is going to give me nightmares and this is ahead of me - so I wont be around for a day or two while I try to get over the trauma.Must remember some clear quartz crystal to keep me focused.
Found an interesting new magazine at my local newsagent today - Its called "Black Rose" Empowering Essence of a Woman.
Its only the third edition and is a bit of a mix of Spellcraft and Cleo.
I have not read it yet but it is very glossy and looks very interesting!
There are articles on tantra, empowerment, marketing and much more..go check it out..

The truth has many faces...

Its a bit like asking witnesses at a car crash to describe what they saw...everyone will have a different view and give different details.
Sometimes my life is like a car crash and I try to see everybody elses perspective of it.
This stops me from doing what I need to do.
It has not worked - it doesnt work.
Some people get hurt in a car crash and some people seem to walk away without a scratch.
But, I dont think anyone really walks away without a scratch, even if it looks that way...
So I have been ever vigilant about avoiding car crashes...but I really cant anymore.
I looked at some photos of my mum yesterday - she spent her whole life working for her community for free.
Yet she was slandered, gossiped about, argued with, been told she had a huge ego and was self centred and only did it for her own benefit. Her whole life, and therefore my whole life, revolved around the self same people who made her into a victim of their abusiveness - yet these people would never lift a finger, never help they just complained...you can never please everybody no matter how hard you try..so in the end you have to please yourself.
I am sure that at some point mum decided not to listen to the crap but to carry on regardless, because she WANTED to.
So, I do it because I want to, I love to and whether anyone else likes it or not ? well, I just can't please everyone.....